These days, now that 97% of the world's females are exclusively screwing only
0.02% of the world's males—(well, and sometimes their husbands and boyfriends, I
suppose)—thanks to the ubiquity of hookup apps, it's getting harder and harder
to get any negative attention at all from grocery store prissy girls! Now, don't
get me wrong; I completely understand! Hey, look, if I belonged to the
sex for which absolutely no standard of social behavior exists whatsoever, it'd
probably be hard for you to get MY attention while I'm busy worrying that, in
these yoga pants, my clitoris might not be entirely visible from across
the store to some people with poor vision - and that I should thus probably go
home and change into something with much thinner material and with an even more
contrasting color before I go stand around in the gymn for an hour to pick out
tonight's anthropomorphic dildo.
I just don't want to be
completely ignored solely because I'm entirely irrelevant to the
modern woman's highly specific sexual whims and/or statistically-impossible physical ideals,
you know?
It's nice when you can still get that fleeting look of,
"Oh, wow, that weird moving inverted-shadow is actually alive and might be
politely acknowledging my existence - EWW!" That's all I want, ladies! I just ask
that you deign to enter reality long enough to recognize and express your
passive-aggressive disgust whenever a human male you don't actively want to fuck right
that moment happens to exist in the same vicinity as you at the same time.
Is that too much to ask?!
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